black2

STUFF

Wed, 07 Feb 2007 14:49:54 GMT

I was looking back over my post from approx a year ago and remembered my 'resolutions'. Here's an update:

1) Japanese. Well, I did nothing in this regard. But I know what 'vampire' is, thanks to Fred Blassie.

2) Keen readers will recall that I bought a piano. This has encouraged more playing, although I find it hard to break out of playing anything that isn't Coldplay at the moment. Fun though.

3) Butchery. While I didn't become the slice 'n' dice expert I hoped, I do have a mean line in brisket now, and made my own bacon over Christmas. Everyone I've told that to looks at me like I just told them to eat their own face. But it's a wonderful thing (well, if you like pork it is). The curing, the hanging, the re-seasoning... it feels like alchemy, and the end results are so tasty and satisfying I'm going to carry on doing it. None of that white piss left in the frying pan when you do it either.

That said, it's disappointing to know I was so dissatisfied in my job previously and still remain so, but I'm far too lazy to do anything about it. I want the job to come to me, as much as I know that can't happen.

Does anybody else feel like the whole interview process is a shame? You are asked a set of pre-recorded questions and you are supposed to parrot the correct pre-recorded answers, and any flash of personality of inspiration gets you black marks. Bah.

Personal life is great though; very happy. Thinking about moving this year which means doing all those DIY jobs I loathe properly. Ugh.

Next week is a holiday, down in snowy Dorset. Oooh, and indeed, aarrrh.

Scheduling

Tue, 17 Oct 2006 14:57:43 GMT

And just like that, the wedding is four days away. That's not an intentional black hole in my LJ!

Things are pretty hectic trying to juggle everything in my head. It's a relatively simple wedding (probably costing under £2000 in total) but still remembering everything is pretty tasking. Coupled with going to New York from Sunday means I have to have everything under control. I had an interview for another job lined up this week, but I had to knock it back as I just hadn't had the time to research a 20 min presentation. Shame, but if it's meant to be, it'll be.

I went out for a round of a golf with a good mate on Saturday, it was a cracker. And then an Indian in the evening, followed by a Guitar Hero session. Rawk.

And now I've only a few days left before we can get rid of those annoyingly twee terms "girlfriend", "partner" and the like. If you've lived with someone for six years, should you really still be referring to them as "girlfriend"? And "fianceé" is too wanky.

I'm also arranging collecting a piano (yes, a piano) as a wedding present tomorrow using some dodgy man-with-a-van out of the paper. I have the most horrendous vision of this guy not being able to lift the darn thing.

A busy week indeed.

Fingers and Toes

Thu, 23 Feb 2006 13:05:19 GMT

I've had a busy couple of weeks.

Item #1. I had one of my big toenails treated for being ingrowing. There was local anaesthetic, and I watched the whole thing. It was one of the most disgusting things I've ever seen. At one point it was like taking a chisel and scraping a block of wood. Worth it though to save the bloody pain my foot has given me.

Item #2. I got engaged! How else do you end a meal of oysters, lobster and tiramisu? We're not hanging about either, October 21st. Less than eight months away.

"Do sum mor' dancin' fat boy, we like that"

Fri, 10 Feb 2006 14:47:58 GMT

Only a quickie to say that I saw Omid Djalili in my local haunt last night, and how I wept with laughter. A very, very funny man, even trying out material based on 7/7. Brave stuff.

And the support act deserves a mention, not just for his familiar puns but the last five minutes of his act which involved playing frisbee with the audience. Mental but mindlessly entertaining.

I was so gleeful at going out I've just ordered tickets to go see Derren Brown.

January's Nearly Over, Y'know...

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 09:39:44 GMT

I think 2006 is going to be an awesome year.

Em and I have already managed to get back in touch with friends that we haven't talked to for years, so I think it's going to be a year of strengthening relationships. Old friends from college, down streets we used to live... here's hoping we bump into you again soon.

I'm increasingly bored with my work, but stuck with the awful premise of having no idea what to move onto. No career path, ladder or anything. So while I bide my time, I'm deciding to try and improve myself, so I picked three things to try and improve on over the year:

1) My Japanese. I was into Japanese from an early age because that's where all the great games came from. Then in University we had a free choice session; I picked Japanese. While I loved it I barely touch so really want to improve.

2) Music. In particular I was taken aback by a comment made by my Dad a few weeks ago when he thought I had "a natural talent for the piano". For one who's not into compliments I was really startled, so I feel I should pay the old man back and try to develop.

3) Butchery. Seriously! Anyone who knows me knows I am into food in a massive way. I try anything culinary. I also weep giant man-tears when I see the awful shiny packets in a supermarket meat aisle. But it's just not easy for me to get to a butcher's before I finish work. So I'd like to mail-order most of an animal, and be able to part and section it properly to turn it into a dozen meals. I'm already quite good with poultry and lamb, but I'd really like to take a whole side of beef and cut it properly. Bit of a strange one, but I adore the versatility and precision of the whole art.

So there's three "resolutions" if you like, and I hope in a year's time I'll have improved on each of these by at least a tiny bit.

Woyk

Tue, 20 Dec 2005 22:23:30 GMT

I really don't understand my work sometimes.

For those of you that don't know, I train IT. Mainly Office apps, but loads more besides. For the past two days I've been showing people how to program with Excel. Usually the people that come on these courses are quite 'up for it' and pretty clued. But this guy I had the past couple of days... totally not with it at all.

I was showing him something at 4pm today he should have understood by 10am YESTERDAY. But he doesn't tell me that at the time. I caught him sitting there at some point just staring at a blank screen... I ask him to open a file, he looks at me like he'd been asked to eat his own face. I advised him to leave the PC alone and just make notes for the remainder of the session.

If it would have carried on much longer, I would have had a Basil Fawlty moment: "please try to understand before one of us DIES."

Bloody Wrestling

Fri, 16 Dec 2005 11:43:54 GMT

A couple of weeks ago, I talk about cancelling Sky Sports.

And then I watch two Raws in a row which I really like!

There was so much to enjoy. Lots of enjoyable talking, matches going somewhere with outcomes meaning something, cliffhanger moments, decent WOMEN'S wrestling - fucking hell - and Victoria looking absolutely stunning, Cena doing all the right things, Nowinski on TV. All I need is The Rock to come back and I'll be completely sold.

I'm not saying I'll never cancel - but there's a reprieve for now.

But why can't both shows be good at the same time? Smackdown is utterly dire right now.

Music

Tue, 06 Dec 2005 12:34:06 GMT

Through various external references I have amassed a monstrous musical backlog this year, unearthing old classics and giving them fresh first play to mine virgin ears. In a wistful mood I list here, in no particular order, my favourite songs of 2005 (which you should note weren't necessarily released in 2005!):

Baba O'Riley - The Who
Shine On You Crazy Diamond - Pink Floyd
Dirty Harry - Gorillaz
10AM Automatic - The Black Keys
Wash In The Rain - The Bees
Yours Is No Disgrace - Yes
Whiskey In The Jar - Thin Lizzy
Who Are You - The Who
At The Mercy - Paul McCartney
Will You Smile Again - And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead

WWEEEEEEE

Mon, 05 Dec 2005 11:57:36 GMT

I still have Survivor Series sitting on the side indoors unwatched. I've managed to stay spoiler-free too which is a miracle. I just can't work up the interest (or time, really) to watch it. I don't really have a wrestling-shaped gap in my life at the moment that it can fit into.

Maybe it's time to cancel the Sky Sports subscription, then I can cry about how I never see wrestling :( I'm not one of those who are disillusioned with the product, I just can't find the time to see it.

Eat My Tree

Sun, 04 Dec 2005 23:45:37 GMT

Fri, 02 Dec 2005 16:12:29 GMT

Coming back to the bloody office yesterday has left me with a bastard cold because of the ridiculously hot heating and rooms full of wheezing splutterers. I shall not be deterred in putting up my tree(s) tomorrow!

Hello Dave

Thu, 01 Dec 2005 11:13:35 GMT

What a weird 24 hours.

Went to see League of Gentlemen at my local theatre last night performing a panto-style show. Very funny, with virtually every character segued in there somehow. Our media-savvy friends blagged backstage passes and went off to consult Gatiss about the latest Doctor Who goings. We got back late, watched some series 3 LoG eating toast and went to sleep.

Next thing I know, I wake up to 7.30am and my train leaves in five minutes. Arse. I'm very late but can still be there before I'm scheduled to train, so I leave a message with the account manager so he knows all about it.

I get there, wait for 20 mins before a bemused administrator explains that this course was cancelled a couple of weeks ago... bah. I come back to the office, virtually round every part of London because Bank station is closed due to a fire. On my way I realise I don't have any lunch - the client I was visiting today always provides, so I naturally didn't preapre anything. Arse. I stop at the cashpoint on the way and have my card eaten by the rogue machine who insists that it has expired.

Bah. And it's only 11.10am. And I can only tell that from the wall because like an idiot I forgot to put my watch on today.

Wed, 30 Nov 2005 10:53:09 GMT

...and I've finished my work for the day. Yes, Tube Lines again burning money as I will now spend the rest of the day getting a new passport before the prices get put up and generally making pretty pictures in Paint Shop Pro.

The last day of November, I got the ladder out last night ready to get the Christmas stuff down from the loft for the weekend. Yessssss!

Wed, 30 Nov 2005 00:14:16 GMT

I really need to go some to get to vampfanman levels of postoronomy. Meh.

I'm working for Tube Lines at the moment, a company that throw money away at anything providing it doesn't go near a train or station. Bear in mind, these guys run the Northern, Piccadilly and Jubilee lines and would much rather pay me to sit on their balcony overlooking the Thames eating toast. Still, it's fun and a nice environment. Generally work kinda satisfies me, but I can't help shaking the feeling there's something far more suited to me I should be doing...

Personally, things chugging quite nicely as Em and I look forward to an awesome Xmas and a trip to Rome in the New Year - our first holiday in four years. Liam can now read like a demon, and can now devour books only slightly slower than me. The question remains, do I take him down the Enid Blyton route, or via Roald Dahl...?

Anyone looking for book tips, (apart from the faintingly obvious Turning the Tables by one JNLister) despite its girly appearance I heartily recommend The Time Traveller's Wife, about a guy who leaps back and forth throughout his life, wooing this girl as he goes. If you imagine Brad Pitt in his Twelve Monkeys role it's very amusing.

Also: anyone trying to figure out what to buy me for Christmas, please observe that Curb Your Enthusiasm is around a tenner a set. Ithankyou.

Wed, 16 Feb 2005 10:14:19 GMT

I've managed to blag a work-from-home day. I can do extreme things like sit around in my pants, eat hot cross buns and wash the bedding. I rock.

Mon, 14 Feb 2005 21:09:20 GMT

I visited Shell today - if a building's any indication of a company's turnover, no wonder they announced record profits last week. Monstrous.

After months of apathy, my girlfriend bought me the Star Wars DVDs and I got suckered in all over again *bah*. Here we go again...

Fri, 11 Feb 2005 18:16:16 GMT

Fried fucking penis.

I'm amazed how well I'm cracking on with that script thingummy. It's defnitely taking shape. ANy moment now I expect ITV to start a new series with exactly the same idea :(

I'm also reading an Andy Kaufman biog which is pushing me to new things.

I expect a super creative surge when I meet up with my writer-in-crime JST - he has this catalytic affect on my brain for churning out great ideas.

Sun, 30 Jan 2005 01:12:18 GMT

Time's a knockin', but my brain's a-buzzin'.

I've stifled a creative urge for many years and I really should write more. I had a great idea for a sitcom today, but I know I'll never get around to writing it.

I'm feeling my age more and more. As much as Ilove all kinds of music, I couldn't stand Scott Mills anymore and whirled my phone's FM receiver on to the next available band... Radio 4. It's stayed there ever since. I love it, and I can't stand that I love it. I was born fucking 35, I'm even older now *hangs head*

Another sign of my age has been to visit all the classic rock that I've never had exposure to in the first part of my life. I'm putting that right with the help of a wilful "father-in-law" with the most monstrous CD collection - hence the current music is Pink Floyd. I can't believe I can go nearly 26 years without hearing this album. I'm wading through every issue of Classic Rock and devouring music at an unholy pace. I'm almost glad my phone can only hold an hour's worth of MP3s, an IpoD (Ha! Watch me buck the capitalisation!) would be overflowing with unheard bumf.

Another sign of my increasing mental age is thoughts turning more and more to family, and relationship, children and marriage... I don't know where my brain will take me with this.

Zombie Mode: Engage

Thu, 28 Oct 2004 09:14:50 GMT

The biggest thing on my mind at the moment is an upcoming work project that involves me working nights for five weeks. I've worked night shifts before, but usually four in a row at most. Never five weeks solid. I have no idea how my body's going to cope. I recall a knotted, nauseous feeling when I used to work, usually around 4am, when your body is irritated at you being up and about but not feeding it. But you have to keep your mealtime routines or you are destroyed when you come off them. It's definitely going to be strange not seeing family for a quality length of time however I can't doubt that the promise of a month's double-time pay before Christmas is keeping my chin up.

Right now I should be doing work but I feel like the LJ might keep me going over nights. Somewhere to ramble. So I needed to get restarted on it. I'm also distracted by awaiting delivery of a new phone. Alas I cannot disguise the geek within.

On a total tangent I'm really looking forward to Question Time tonight. On one side, Michael Moore. On the other... Richard Littlejohn. That's got to be in anyone's dream match list, surely? If they end up being friends I will very displeased.

words have been delayed

Wed, 27 Oct 2004 21:12:36 GMT

And if anyone can get the subject reference, maximo points.

I did something recently I thought I wouldn't do for years. I let my four-year old son watch wrestling.

I always thought I wouldn't let him watch wrestling (naturally I mean WWE) until he was older and always, always watch it with him to guide how he interpreted what he saw.

I fell down on the former but carried through with the latter. I had an urge to watch SmackDown! on a Saturday morning and he was watching it too. So it just stayed on. If he was going to watch any, it would have to be the 'sanitised' version put out on Sky One weekend mornings. He eyed it curiously for a while, then asked why they were hitting each other - the Dudley Boyz were involved I'm sure. I insisted that they were only pretending to hit each other, and why it was bad for people to hit each other in usual circumstances.

My argument was not well supported when we turned over to find Olympic Boxing, which I found harder to justify :/

Anyway he carried on watching, and I was interested in who would catch his eye. His first squeal of surprise was at a Mysterio topé, whom he knows as "man-who-wears-a-mask". To my chagrin he then became interested in Kidman *spit*, whom I have to admit I have a recent grudging respect for. The only wrestler's name he can remember is "Eddie GueRRERo" whom he delights in elongating the syllables of. Of all the names to recall, why this one?!

WWE must be doing something right, because he picked up on the fact that there were "goodies", in his vernacular. Lost for words he labelled those that were not "goodies" as "idiots". Forget your classic heel/face divide, 2004 marks the beginning of the goodie/idiot era.

I only occassionally let him watch it - and only *ever* when I'm with him. I feel in part bad as a parent in introducing the odd stab of violence but at the same time a Werther's Original style feeling that stems from sharing something that has brought me so many years of happiness with my son.

Is that what being a father is all about?

Fri, 13 Aug 2004 20:21:23 GMT

I'm back after taking time off to be at home for a while. However, I contemplated a meaningful entry for the day then became utterly distraught when faced with the brilliance of JNLister's log. I am not worthy :(

Lossless

Fri, 16 Jul 2004 15:38:18 GMT

No stories in a week, that's not so good... I've had a lot of free time due to odd work circumstances, so no excuses there *slaps creativity gland*

I've been pondering what superlinusxxx and amancalledmikey have written in recent blogs: that they made wrong Uni decisions. I did sorta the same thing, going to a Uni in London whilst commuting in from Essex. I wonder if my choice to do that caused me to cut my studies short and start working. I think I would've really dug the 'proper' student life, and having entrenched my life into digs and forming relationships there it would have been really difficult to quit from there. I probably would have had more support and might have studied algebra a bit harder rather than going on the wwe.com chat rooms :(

I'm not dissatisfied with how my life's turned out, no regrets at all. But I do wonder how different my life would have. Majorly, I'm sure. Or maybe in a Sliding Doors-esque fashion it would have all worked out the same, just from a different direction. I dunno.

Terminal

Sat, 10 Jul 2004 09:14:59 GMT

Picking a splinter from the ladder in front of him, the skinny man contemplated his earlier discovery. What was that strange lump that he’d found under his armpit? It puzzled him; he was sure it hadn’t been there when he’d washed last week, and yet it had just appeared. He’d heard about such growths and couldn’t decide what it augered – but he was sure it wasn’t good.

His mind raced, thinking of his dearest Edith, and how he couldn’t live without seeing her again. And what about little James, who he hadn’t yet seen? All the things he wouldn’t ever see, ever do, snatched from him by cruel nature.

He decided to feel for the lump again. His fingers couldn’t find it. He searched up and down his arm, and then he touched it. It had moved to his bicep. He squeezed tenderly and it moved down to his forearm. Panicking, he pushed the lump down into his other hand. His tobacco pouch fell out into his palm.

At last he felt relieved. He could breathe unrestricted again. He allowed himself a wide grin of true joy.

A distant whistle trilled and he scrambled head first out of the trench.

Looking Back

Fri, 09 Jul 2004 16:06:47 GMT

Woah, that was quite the splurge! Considering I'm supposed to be prearing for another hard day's training, I'm enjoying the outlet. Haven't exercised the creative gland in quite a while.

241 Words: Payment

Fri, 09 Jul 2004 14:56:11 GMT

The head flew up and blood geysered from the open neck. Haohmaru smirked and chewed a toothpick. He ripped cloth from the fresh corpse’s ankle and ran it down the length of his sword.

He burst into the tavern and threw the canvas bag onto the table with a sloppy thunk. “There’s the head of your spy, Jubei. Cash, now. And extra to put up with the pig-dog’s stench. And picking off his bodyguards.”

The battle-lined ex-warrior finished his grog and looked at the spiky-haired mercenary from behind one good eye, a patch hiding a wound on the other.

“Get lost, the deal was settled.” Jubei knew him well, this was all optimistic bluster, all because he’d forgotten to pay him several times.

“Pay up you filthy wretch,” returned Haohmaru. “Or I’ll slice up that pretty wife of yours too!”

Jubei’s face changed instantly to utter contempt, hand on the pommel of his katana. “You wouldn’t dare you gutless killer. I’d lop off your bollocks and eat them in front of you.”

Haohmaru hesitated, then smirked. “You’re right as always you old bastard. Just give me what we agreed.”

Jubei tossed the pouch onto the table and watched the killer leave with his money, amused that he had underpaid him yet again. It was dirty work but it made politics so much easier. He peered inside the bag and dropped his mug to floor.

His wife’s eyes stared back at him.